Your reality is shaped by your beliefs, thoughts, and previous experiences. Your reality is a function of your consciousness. Current experiences, of course, further shape or prove or disprove your thoughts and beliefs that redefine your reality.

I remember an incident many years ago as vividly as if it happened yesterday. A friend was quite offended when I said We create our own reality. I specifically used the collective we so she understood that I meant everyone, not just her. She defended an opposite belief; she preferred to believe that the world does things to her. I rarely argue about beliefs, so I let the difference pass.

I am grateful that I had such an experience early in my career. Since this incident, I have been more cautious about how I present this idea. It depends on your current state of consciousness as to how you are likely to view this phenomenon of creating your own reality. For example,

* If you are a person who feels like a victim, you might perceive this statement as an accusation.

* If you are a person who is overly controlling (or one who wants to take control), you might consider the statement is an invitation to manipulate the Universe.

* If you are a person who desires to accept responsibility for your life, you are likely to find this idea of creating your own reality deeply transformational. If a particular situation is a mess, the idea that you can create a new situation is empowering. So, what at first seems like bad news is good news.

Recently, I worked with a client who considered he was in a mess. Jim did not question the fact that he had created this mess, because he had already embraced the idea of creating his own reality. His questions was, Why would I do this to myself? I immediately responded with I dont think thats a very helpful question now. Lets look at how rather than why so that you can use the same strategies to help you out of the mess that got you into the mess. Our discussion was much richer as a result of looking at how rather than why. Quickly we identified the specific thoughts and concepts that led him into the mess, and honed in on those to began his journey out of the mess.

Why would I do this to myself was not a wise question for Jim at that time for a very specific reason. I recognized a belief in him that I also recognize in so many people these days who embrace or try to embrace the idea of creating your own reality. Often packaged with this principle, unfortunately, is the belief that you do certain things to yourself so that you can learn something that you missed learning earlier.